🌸 Why I Thought I Was Bad at Tech (Spoiler: I Was Just Surrounded by Chaos).

🌸 Home of the SCETM Method, RISE SoftlyTM & C.A.L.M. RISETM Elements

There was a time — not even that long ago — when I genuinely thought I was bad at tech.

Not because I didn’t understand things.
Not because I couldn’t learn.
Not because I wasn’t capable.

But because tech culture made me feel like I was constantly one step behind, one question too slow, one emotional reaction too much, one “Wait, can you repeat that?” away from being exposed as a fraud.

And if you’ve ever felt like that too, let me tell you something gently and with love:

You’re not bad at tech.
You’re just navigating a system that wasn’t designed for you.

Let me explain — with stories, chaos, and a few emotional plot twists.

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🌿 The Day I Realised Tech Wasn’t the Problem — The Environment Was

I remember sitting in a meeting where everyone spoke in acronyms like they were casting spells.

“KPI, SLA, API, ETA, ROI, OKR—”

Meanwhile, my ND brain was like:

“Is this English?
Is this a puzzle?
Is this a cry for help?”

I asked a question — a normal one, a reasonable one — and the room reacted like I’d asked them to explain quantum physics using interpretive dance.

That’s when the thought hit me:

“Maybe I’m just not cut out for this.”

But here’s the truth I didn’t know yet:

I wasn’t the problem.
The environment was.

Because when I worked with people who explained things clearly, who didn’t gatekeep knowledge, who didn’t treat questions like weaknesses — I thrived.

When I worked with people who valued emotional intelligence, creativity, intuition, and softness — I excelled.

When I worked with people who didn’t assume I was slow, confused, or fragile — I shined.

It wasn’t me.
It was the room.

🌸 The ND Brain vs. Tech Culture (A Love‑Hate Relationship)

Let’s talk about the neurodivergent part, because this is where things get beautifully chaotic.

My brain is brilliant.
But it is also… dramatic.

It does NOT do:

  • linear thinking

  • “Just follow the process”

  • “Just focus”

  • “Just do it this way”

  • “Just be consistent”

My brain does:

  • creative leaps

  • intuitive problem‑solving

  • pattern recognition

  • emotional intelligence

  • “I don’t know how I got here but the solution works”

And tech culture LOVES linear thinkers.

So ND women often feel like:

  • We’re too much

  • We’re too emotional

  • We’re too chaotic

  • We’re too sensitive

  • We’re too slow

  • We’re too fast

  • We’re too intense

  • We’re too soft

But here’s the truth:

Our brains are not broken — they’re brilliant.
They’re just not factory settings brains.

And that’s a good

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🌿 The Moment I Realised I Was Actually Really Good at Tech

It happened on a random Tuesday.

I was working on a problem that three people before me couldn’t solve.
Everyone was stressed.
Everyone was frustrated.
Everyone was convinced it was impossible.

I looked at it.
I tilted my head.
I squinted.
I made a weird thinking noise.
I clicked around like a raccoon trying to open a bin.

And then…
I solved it.

Not because I followed the instructions.
Not because I did it “the right way.”
Not because I was the smartest person in the room.

But because my brain saw something, theirs didn’t.

And that’s when it hit me:

I’m not bad at tech.
I’m just different.
And different is powerful.

🌸 The Soft Girl Tech Philosophy (AKA: My Survival Strategy)

Here’s what I’ve learned after years of thinking I was the problem:

✨ 1. Softness is not weakness

Softness is emotional intelligence.
Softness is clarity.
Softness is intuition.
Softness is a strategy.

✨ 2. Asking questions is a superpower

People who pretend to know everything are dangerous.
People who ask questions build better systems.

✨ 3. ND brains are innovators

We don’t follow the path — we create new ones.

✨ 4. You don’t need to be loud to be powerful

Soft confidence hits different.
It’s grounded.
It’s steady.
It’s magnetic.

✨ 5. You don’t need to “fix” yourself

You just need to work in environments that understand you.

🌿 The Day I Stopped Apologising for Existing

One day, I caught myself apologising for:

  • asking a question

  • needing clarification

  • taking a moment to think

  • being overwhelmed

  • being emotional

  • being human

And I thought:

Why am I apologising for being a person?

Men don’t apologise for breathing.
Men don’t apologise for asking questions.
Men don’t apologise for taking up space.

So I stopped apologising too.

And everything changed.

My confidence grew.
My ideas landed.
My voice strengthened.
My presence expanded.
My career shifted.
My identity softened.
My nervous system exhaled.

And that’s when TechShe Pulse was born.

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